Thanks.
Unfortunately not 100% people on the forum as I know for a fact that it is not 100% people.
It’s not good with me. I started having panic attacks. It is very bad as I am not sure when I will have it. I am going to the doctor tomorrow and will mention it. I hate myslf. Why should I continue when my body is totally starting to play up and it is showing me I can’t cope anymore.
You aren’t nobody to us! Cut out those negative people. Don’t listen to them. As @Mel_4 said taking care of individuals is not done by stupid people. You always have to be alert.
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But tell me, who’s loved by 100% of people ? Not me, not you, and even the best person in the world isn’t.
Well, I feel you on that point. I the kind of person who’s never ill, and not so long ago my body began to do stupid things. And in those moment, you know you have to be strong for your body. Your body doesn’t want to die ; at the opposite, it wants to live, that’s why you feel pain : because he is fighting to live. Don’t let him down !
On a more… medical tone 
, did you think about going to see an ostheopath ? They can really help with anxiety and panic attack.
(There’s a key on my computer that sends my post automatically and I keep hitting it -.-)
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It is a hard job and you may end up saving lives
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It’s true someone has to do it, however I’ve been doing this work for better of 11years ! And i can tell you it takes a certain type of person to be there for someone as much as we have to be. These poor people have most of their dignity taken away. And its up to us to give them back as much as we can! Its amazing the people I care for, I get along better with them then I do people my own age! I’ve met some assholes in this job, who treat these people like shit! So no losers are not the type of people needed for this job! You may not feel that way but I promise those people you care for feel differently! Only recently have I decided to move up and start at the hospital, but I still have my clients I promised to care for til the end!
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that’s the spirit 
Well true, but it makes me feel even worse. I care about people more than about myself. This job is very very hard.
I am an idiot. You know why? I am letting people in and then they are stabbing me in the back from the front. Recently I found out again how it is. This time I’ve learned my lesson.
I won’t be here long enough to get burned again. No more letting people in my life. Only the few that I already let in.
but now i turned the music on and i am feeling bit better
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I know all about people stabbing me and my family in the back, it’s not a nice feeling especially for us who have had to go through the past 10+ years fighting for a normal family. But we have lost MANY friends and family with no one on our side. Every time we have tried to be honest to someone, they blame something on us, making up lies.
Where we live, we have parts of my moms family who don’t speak to us along with two ex friends from my high school (one of which goes to my college).
Music has helped for me A LOT, especially LP’s/. Every night from school, I would put on an album of theirs, whether it was 1 or more. Karate used to help me since my anger is stored in my chest and it builds up but since I don’t do martial arts anymore, I scream it out. That is why I love rock/metal music and right now I’m listening to SuperBeast by Rob Zombie
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And I still use the nickname “Beast” but I like it as “Wolf Beast”. The reason why is because I love wolves and werewolves (as long as they are done right)
If you thinking like that, I’m sorry for this, but it’s your problem. What I mean is that the people around takes care of you, but if you are just calling for attention then they will stop helping you.
This is no the first time I saw you like this, saying these things and then trying to forget them and act like nothing. You need help now, we are trying to help you, we are not against you in any form, so please, look for help.
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i am. i just have bad moments in life. i will be fine
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The same of the last time. You need to stop this now. Don’t let other down. Don’t let yourself down. You can’t pass all the 2018 acting like this, you have to help yourself now, you won’t lose anything just for try it.
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oh i won’t go pass the 2018. and if i am that annoying you can feel free to ignore me
I’m so happy that you are hanging in there I know u are still in pain I’m so sorry that u are in not feeling any better. Just to let you know I care so I’m going to worry about my lp family. I truly hope that you will feel better soon. Stay storng and take care of yourself
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Please @rorybourbon, don’t be like that. I’m sure @IronSoldier16 means well for you.
It’s true that for others to start to love you, you have to love yourself first. And it seems to me like you don’t. And what’s worse - you even don’t want to. And you definitely should. If you don’t see what’s to love in yourself, then how can others?
And if you cannot find that light in yourself, others can help. Maybe professionals. You just have to listen instead of building walls around yourself 
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See!!! You’re pushing me away just because!!
You’re not annoying me (or others). But… Seriously this is how you try others when they just come here and try to help you? Why are you doing me this?
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I’m so sorry to hear that. I wish I lived by anyone of you to give you support face to face but I’m sending you hugs and love!!
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i am going to a professional. soon. i hate myself but this is all other story
@IronSoldier16 i am tired of hearing the same thing. you can leave like the rest did. we had a deal anyway
If you don’t do anything we can’t force you, and we won’t. The only thing that we can do is try to help you, and this is the only way, at least for now.
You can’t hate yourself. And don’t ever EVER say that again - not to yourself. You started to believe that, but it’s not true.
Everyone is different and have their own problems, their own inner battles that (s)he has to win. You’re no exception. You just have to fight, search for the light and find it. Hate is not the cure for the world - love is. It’s always been and always will be. Hate is poison to your mind, don’t give in to it, EVER.
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