Why ashamed?
Life isn’t easy for anyone… We all have our demons…
And believe me, I never planned to grow older than 40… I wanted to leave many many times from a rather young age… Guess in that way, my fysical problems helped me to (sometimes) overcome my darker mind. I say sometimes because, as “strong” as I might seem now, I expect a bounce back (or how do you say that in english) … Just like the depression I had last year after the surgery…
4 Likes
@anna834 
wiping that tear away, giving you a strong hug and a whole bunch of flowers to smile right up 
@Fravaco do get another opinion brother.
i will take @lpfan61 advice and i will ask my friend too.
but that’s IF we talk …
weird outcome in our relationship with him you see,
part of the deal of that wish was that his wife would hate me so as a mirror i’d hate her back!
assuring a family at the cost of an old now friendship.
And it’s just like those you shook off @Fravaco
yeah, i’ve had my share of hypocrits after my 30s
looks like our eyes only open after the third decade of our lives.
Don’t we have to thank the situations that made us see them clearly?
it’s always some misfortune because that’s when the snakes around us find it best to strike!
Reading all your thoughts and i too admire your strength, try to get into your shoes and can’t imagine, yet
add some gratitude to the situation that freed you of all these masks!
sounds to me like your life will take a much better turn than the one you imagine.
all you need is strength and faith in what is happening around us not being random!
sometimes we need to get real close to death to appreciate life.
and right there, we discover why we were born in the first place.
when we give it all up and start following what our heart wants to do.
it’s my life’s message, in case it’s not blunt obvious.
won’t share any link even if i have three videos in mind
but i only make them for people who are loosing their hope in this dark world they found themselves in like me.
it’s cool
we got this!
2 Likes
No 
… Only 
These talks may have been a bit too much on the heavy side lately…
So…
@anna834 how many sheep did you count today? And did they get you to fall asleep 
2 Likes
Thank you.
Shame, guilt, pain.
Mostly pain that took away my breathing, let my chest close, brings me down a my knees. (Nothing physical. Thats my story.
Death seems so peaceful, restful.
Nothing to do with that.
More the open up.
The feeling and showing for such a big audience.
Dear @achilleas7 thank you so much! And thank you to not throw one of your videos at me. Really! I hug you!
3 Likes
I actually agree but remember we won’t actually experience it. My biggest fear is to die suddenly. I would really like to experience my moment of death…
Death itself is not something to fear, it’s a part of life, just as birth is
1 Like
Its not akut for me. Jet.
I come from really dark times.
But since 2015 it’s better. Just the realisation that it never is really over, is something I carry.
Thats interesting, never thought about it. But I will.
So good!
Yeah. But birth! It’s the greatest! This moment! Everything. Mother talking here 
Ps. I tend to lough the hardest, when I talk about shitty stuff. So no one wunder. 
I can relate a bit… Father and grandfather talking here… Although… I haven’t seen my 2 sons in almost 20 years and my 2 grandsons I have never seen in real life (only on picture)… But that’s all I say about that for now…
(Shit, I really don’t want any more compassion)
2 Likes
Forget it, compassion time is over!
New day! Whiny!
3 Likes
Not that I care that much for a car but he’s only new from january… Don’t need the whole hassle with police and insurences right now
Just kidding
Would be totally pissed if someone hit my car.
1 Like
Normally a car is just a tool for me… I buy new cars but I drive them until they’re ready for the garbage… But, on the other hand, driving is the one thing I actually still can do without problems…
1 Like
I’m totally into my cars.
Always a little bit home for me.
But I try not to use it, at home I do everything by bike.
Sorry, don’t want to rub anything
How is it with you?
Everyone else seems asleep or at the fireworks.
Some destiny talk?
Or to much for now?
1 Like
Oh rub all you want…
Uh that didn’t come out right 
I never liked riding bikes… I prefered walking…
2 Likes
1 Like
Yeah, it’s quiet here… Or maybe they’re all secretly reading our conversations…
3 Likes
Nothing to prevent that.
And I’m already on a embarrassment and shame run for a while here.
Some bat said, you get used to it.
2 Likes
I don’t think we said anything embarrasing or to be ashamed about…
Btw, why would you care for that. There’s nothing shameful in being yourself and speaking your mind… That’s the secret for a happier life… Don’t give a f*ck what others think of you…
2 Likes
Ja, ja.
Nothing new about that.
But to say and do, different thing.
And I am on a honesty trip here.
I have long giving up to look what They may say.
As long as these people are strangers to me. No problem. So I can be much more honest and open there, were others never will.
What do I care what others think and they dislike me probably anyway.
It gets hard, as soon people get important to me.
2 Likes