Its’ a relief to be able to post somewhere and not feel like im weird for feeling so crushed by the weight of it. I feel like its hard to talk to my friend irl about it cuz im not sure they would understand.
I feel numb and still cant believe it. I’ve cried so much already every often it just catches me off guard and im in tears again. And then i think of the guys… god i just want to give them all massive hugs and cry with them.
I was belting out mtm last night and got to bleed it out and had to skip it and leave out all the rest and shadow of the day. I forgot the first verse referenced hanging and the others are just too much.even valentines day just hurts. Their meaning has changed and I can’t deal.
Also the Spotify bio’s been updated. God this is just too much! I just want this to be a bad dream.
“Reminders pull the floor from your feet”- they were right about that…